So a few days ago I was on the bus to go grab lunch with my coworkers (no empty seat effect this time). It was a fairly mundane ride, we talked about work and class and all that. Nothing unusual. But something came from nowhere that made my stomach turn and instantly made the conversation awkward and turned it to silence.

No, it was not a fart

Someone had dropped the N-bomb (the word “nigga”) and I had no idea of the other 4 black people on the bus who said it or what direction it came from. Eventually, we started chatting again about regular boring shit until again, seemingly from nowhere we heard it again. Loudly. NIGGA. It was at this point when I realized that we had a ninja on our hands. A dangerous foe indeed.

You wouldn't believe how hard it is to find pictures of a Black ninja on Google

The ninja is very similar to the troll, except he or she does not immediately make himself or herself known. The ninja can literally be anyone of ethnic descent, and they know exactly when to utter words or phrases to make you the most uncomfortable in mixed company.

"Niggas aint shit, indeed, Doris"

The ninja can handicap any social situation with awkwardness and a deep desire (that you must repress) to apologize for your own race. The other people can hear it and acknowledge how much they dislike it, but you can never say anything. You must always ignore the words and presence of the ninja at all costs.  They don’t play fair, and they can even strike when you think they are out of range. Ever been in a building and suddenly felt the bass to a “Suck it or Not” blasted loudly from outside from the biggest car speakers ever? The work of a ninja. Ever been checking your email and gotten the “wasup, nigga” gchat message while your screen is visible to everyone? E-Ninja. They own your life. And there is nothing you can do.

Good luck.

That movie title “Who’s that Ninga” has me dead by the way

2 Responses to “Ninjas”
  1. Kathlene says:

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Check out what others are saying...
  1. […] it can make people of any race quiver and leave. However, in the wrong hands it can turn you into a Ninja or Troll, and it is not a technique advisable to anyone with other viable options. It is the secret […]

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